Tuesday, 30 July 2013

Online Dating, I am a bit scared but it is my only choice.

At various times of the year - when it is sunny, when there are events on, holiday time, Christmas - I wish that I have a partner to enjoy the times with.

I also, and I am ashamed to say it, look at women that are in relationships and then ask the universe 'really, what is so wrong with me?'.  I know I am not the best looking woman out there, I know I am not the thinnest woman out there but judging by recent pictures I have seen, I am certainly not the ugliest or fattest woman out there.  I know, I have said all this before, blah blah blah, but I am intelligent, I am practical, I own my own home, I have a good job, I can cook, I can do DIY, I can do basic car maintenance (change tyres, change oil, fuses, break fluid, bulbs), I am not a panicker, I am not a girly girl, I like SCI-Fi, I even (and I have never used this as a plus before) have big boobs!  Back in the 40s I would have been considered quite a catch but these days I really do not know what men want!  

I know that I don't go out anymore, but years ago, when I did, I always felt invisible, blokes would push past me to talk to the woman behind me, I struggled to get served at the bar.  I seemed to be wearing a permanent invisibility cloak, even before Harry Potter was a twinkle in JK's eye.

I have tried online dating in the past and it was not at all successful.  Although you can reasonably limit who you search for (with some agencies at least), you cannot limit who contacts you, and everyone who contacted me would not have been with my search parameters, not least because they were all 100s of miles away.  People who I contacted either just ignored me or said thanks-but-no-thanks.

I have tried the paying sites too, eHarmony actually refused my application telling me I was unmatchable.  I know I am never going to meet anyone at work or on the bus so if I want a relationship I am only left with online dating but I am wary.

I know that if anyone does talk to me (unlikely) and want to meet up that I am going to have to leave the house, and that is an obstacle in itself.

Does anyone have any positive online dating stories to reassure me a bit?

Unless anyone has a brother, friend, dad who is looking?

Sunday, 28 July 2013

Sunday Night Mash Up

I had a fab night out Friday, but boy, have I paid for it!

I haven't had one of those two day hangovers that seem to occur once you hit a certain age but I have just been so tired, tired to the point that I just want to cry.

I had woken up just before 4am Friday morning, which is pretty much par for the course, had a day at work and then back to my friend's house to get ready to go out (by get ready I mean get changed and brush my hair, my night out prep is rarely much more than that).  

I arrived home at 1am and was in bed very shortly afterwards.  I realised just as I fell asleep that I had forgotten to take my tablets but I thought missing one day would not make a difference.  I was wrong.

I did have a lie in on Saturday, not waking up until just before 5am, I was up at 6 and at Kingsbury Water Park by 8am with Mum and the dog.

After I got back home I pretty much spent the rest of the day asleep, a combination of lack of sleep the day before and not taking my tablets.  I was also still feeling the effects of the whatever-it-was attack that I had had when I was out.  I don't know if you can develop asthma later in life, but that was what I thought it was, it was a little bit scary.

I have felt even more tired today, I have again spent a lot of today asleep, even the wooden floor has looked inviting.  I think I might have a really early night tonight to try and feel better for work tomorrow.

It was a Comedy Night that I had been to, at a local hotel.  The comedians were really good, if a little too sweary.  As some of you will know, I am not a fan of swearing.  I don't think it is big, I don't think it is clever and I don't think it is funny.  But as it seems to be accepted by the general populace in much the same way as 'the' and 'a' are, I just have to put up with it.

There was a woman in the audience who was absolutely hammered, and got very angry and abusive towards the comedians, she did get taken outside by one of her friends, but soon came back in.  All of it kicked off because of Gammon cooked in Cola in her slow cooker (you had to be there, it is just going to take too long to explain), but as one of the comedians has since tweeted, the gammon was quite clearly secondary to the coke in her recipe.

We had a bit of rain yesterday, my garden was looking a bit battered this morning.  This is a road about 10 minutes walk from me.

Photo courtesy of BBC/Layna Marie Duke

The rest of the week has been very quiet, let's see what next week brings.

Silent Sunday - 28/07/13

Friday, 26 July 2013

Ten Day You Challenge - Six Places

Six Places

1.  Calella, my home from home, I would live here if I could.

2.  Barcelona, I wouldn't want to live here (would never be able to afford it for one thing) but I always spend a couple of days here whenever I visit Spain.

3.  Great Yarmouth, I love the English seaside, I actually prefer it when it is dull and windy.

4.  Prestatyn, I have had some fantastic times here and am looking forward to going back next year.

5.  Coventry Cathedral, certainly the most picturesque place I have ever worked.

6.  Bed!  I cannot spend enough time in mine (this isn't it, it wouldn't fit in my room.)

Tuesday, 23 July 2013

Does Meal Planning Work?

I have been reading a lot lately about meal planning and how much time and money it saves people.

I have decided to give it a try.  My problem is that by the time I get home from work I can't always be bothered to cook any tea, and sometimes just end up with toast.  As it is just me that I have to feed this is not a problem.  I actually do sort of plan my meals during the winter in so far that I fill the slow cooker on a Monday morning and eat out of that for 5 nights.

Similarly, in the winter I also manage to take food into work for my lunch, but as soon as the weather gets better I start buying in.

I may, to begin with, prepare all my week's meals and stick them in the freezer so that when I get home I just  have to put them in the microwave while I go and put my pyjamas on as the danger is I revert to my toast only diet despite having bought in lots of things to cook.

It was so much easier when I still lived at home and just had dinner put in front of me every night.

Anyway, I am going to plan this week and then shop and cook at the weekend, we shall see how long it lasts.

Sunday, 21 July 2013

Sunday Night Mash Up

Not a lot has happened this week, it has been too hot!

I am feeling a bit better after a week on my increased meds, still not in a rush to leave the house though, hopefully in time that will happen.

I received the bag, pen and keyring this week that I had won on the Wagamama app on facebook, I should have a noodle cookbook coming soon too.

Also this week, I received a PPI claim from from a Credit Card provider that I had a card with 6 years ago and had completely forgotten about, I certainly don't remember taking out PPI with it.  Luckily someone at work has already had the same letter and have already received their refund cheque so I had no concerns about it being genuine.  I am not expecting to get anything from it, but if I do it will be a nice, and welcome, bonus.

There has been a funny smell in the house for the last couple of days and I have not been able to work out what it is.  It seems to have gone now but I don't know whether that is because I have cleaned it away or because I have had the doors and windows open nearly all weekend.  Time will tell.

And that is about it for this week, enjoy the weather everyone!

Silent Sunday - 21/07/13

Friday, 19 July 2013

Ten Day You Challenge - Seven Wants

Seven Wants

1.  I want a car, it has been so long since I have been able to afford one, hopefully it will not be too much longer.  My first car was a Citroen 2CV, this is the same colour and year that mine was.

2.  I want to live in Spain, but not have to work.  I want to be able to roll out of bed and into a swimming pool.

3.  So I want to win the lottery.

4.  I want at least one relationship before I die (you may notice that this is a recurring theme).

5.  I want to pluck up the courage to stand on the glass floor in Blackpool Tower.

6.  I want a new kitchen.

7.  I want to be happy!

Tuesday, 16 July 2013

Who did you want to be when you grew up?

I first wanted to be Lizzie Dripping, who I have just discoverd was played by Tina Heath who later went on to be a Blue Peter presenter.  Lizzie Dripping had two long plaits, as did I back then, played in a graveyard, which even back then I thought was great (see I have always been a strange child) and was friends with a witch, it all seemed the perfect life.

The next person I can remember wanting to be was Maya from Space 1999 because she had the ability to become any animal she wanted, I thought this would be very useful and if I couldn't be friends with a witch, then I wanted to run with the animals. Although having looked at a picture now, she does look a bit strange even if she was an alien.

I then wanted to be Ace from Doctor Who, she was the first assistant that I remembered who did not run around being a girly girl.  She wore a Harrington jacket and made her own bombs.  What wasn't to like?

The next person I remember wanting to be was Xena, Warrior Princess.  No explanation needed here I think.

These days I want to be either Abby Sciuto, from NCIS

Or Penelope Garcia from Criminal Minds

Both incredibly intelligent women with their own sense of style.

I have also, at various times, wanted to be Vanessa Shannesa Jenkins (I have just remembered that as I have just switched over to Gavin & Stacey), Kat Slater and Gwen from Torchwood.

Who did you want to be, or who do you still want to be?

Sunday, 14 July 2013

Sunday Night Mash Up

It has been a bit of a mixed week this week.

This week I have hit 3000 views of my blog AND I have my first GFC follower!  Hello to you!

Thursday evening I had my review with the GP, for some reason I was convinced that she was going to stop my tablets, in fact she actually DOUBLED my dosage, I am now taking 100mg tablets every day.  Apparently I should be much further along by now than I am.  I have also been given some stronger Vitamin D tablets too.

Saturday I went to Kingsbury Water Park with Mum and Bess, we went early before it got too warm.

Today I went for a meal to celebrate a 60th Wedding Anniversary, the meal was lovely, but the service was just so slow, it wasn't even that busy with over half the restaurant empty.

There is nothing much happening next week, up to now anyway!

Silent Sunday - 14/07/13

Friday, 12 July 2013

10 Day You Challenge - 9 Loves

9 Loves

1.  I love my Mum and Dad, but have just realised that I do not have a photo of them together!  I must rectify this.

2.  Bess the Dog.  I have plenty of photos of Bess.

3.  Spain, particularly Calella

4.  Wayne's World.  I cannot stress how much I loved this film.  I knew the script.  Myself and two friends created our own soundtrack before the official one was released.  I went to fancy dress parties dressed as Wayne.  Wayne's World 2 was awful, apart from the YMCA scene.

5.  My bed.  I cannot spend enough time in my bed.

6.  Music.  Music gets me to and from work every day, not only does it keep me awake, it also drowns out ignorant bus users who seem to think we all want to hear the noises emanating from their mobile phones.

7.  My Kindle.  It took me ages to convince myself that I could justify the expense of a kindle, but now I would not be without it as I can carry so many books with me.

8.  CSI.  I know so many ways to get rid of a body.....

9.  My friends.  Where would we be without friends?  Even though most of them are not local, I do look forward to spending time with them all.

Tuesday, 9 July 2013

Cycling? Then get off the pavement.

You will notice I didn't say please, but I don't see why I need to since it is against the law.

When I was younger (cue Hovis music, if you don;t know what I mean I must be older than I thought) the rule was that if the wheel of your bike was over a certain size then you were not allowed to ride on the pavement - I think it was 13 inches but I could be wrong.

These days, the official Government website (www.gov.uk) has this to say

You MUST NOT cycle on a pavement, Laws HA 1835 sect 72 & R(S)A 1984, sect 129

Yet people either ignore this fact, or are completely ignorant, and as we know, ignorance is no defence.

I do not move out of the way of cyclists on the pavement, I make them move out of my way, I do. however, slow down so that they have to wait if the pavement is not wide enough for them to pass me.  This is probably the only time that being nearly six feet tall and sixteen stones works in my favour.

I haven't come to blows with anyone yet but I am guessing it won't be long, I have no problem with the Police being called to any altercation if it should occur, however they seem to be as ignorant of the laws as the cyclists themselves ignoring any cyclists passing on the pavement.

I did have abuse shouted at me as I did not automatically give way to a cyclist on the pavement one evening, but as he was pedalling furiously away whilst he was doing it it somehow reduced the threat.

The other morning I was walking to the bus stop and a cyclist was coming towards me, there was only a narrow gap to get through due to a car being parked on the pavement (I will come back to that shortly), he speeded up to try and get through the gap before I reached it and failed miserably and so had to stop and squeeze himself against the railings as I just carried on walking.  I had to smile to myself.

I would suggest that we reintroduce the Cycling Proficiency Test so that people are aware of the rules, and if you are not confident enough to ride on the road, then you do not ride at all, but we all know that neither of these things will happen.

Cars on the pavement, the same Government website has this to say

You MUST NOT park partially or wholly on the paveme4nt in London, and should not do so elsewhere unless signs permit it..... Law GL(GPA) sect 15

I would like to think that that everyone who drives has a licence, and that everyone that has a licence has sat a test and therefore should be familiar with the Highway Code but I know I am wrong, or again it could just be that people don't care about others and as long as they are not inconvenienced then why should they worry about whether they are breaking the law or not?

Similarly, the road where I catch the bus has double yellow lines on it as it is leading off a roundabout.  They might as well not be there for all the notice taken of them.  Also the crossing place (identified by the break in the barriers, the dropped kerb and centre island) is generally blocked off by someone parking there so that they can get to the hairdressers, takeaway or betting shop.  And the Police just drive past, completely blinkered.

Is there any point in having laws?

Sunday, 7 July 2013

Sunday Night Mash Up

I had an excellent start to the week, I arrived at work to be given a letter telling me that my pay banding had been increased to a 5 in line with my colleagues.  Getting a new line manager certainly gets things moving!

The rest of the week has been pretty unremarkable, the weather has been hot which has meant a lot of vegetable watering, but at least I have been able to get the washing dry.  Something that annoys me about the hot weather is the people that shut their dogs in and never take them anywhere when the weather is cold, but as soon as it gets ridiculously hot they take them out for long walks or to sit in the sun in the park, why?  They never look happy, and I have yet to see any evidence of water for them.  I know Bess the dog likes to sun herself in the garden, but when she gets too hot she comes back inside or lays under the tree, and there is always plenty of water about for her.

This weekend saw the Godiva Festival return to Coventry, it was cancelled last year due to the bad weather, if anyone hasn't heard of our local free festival, here is a link.  

Photo courtesy of the Coventry Telegraph

I would have liked to have gone, but although I am feeling much better these days thanks to my medication, I am still not in a position to be able to do things by myself like I used to, it is still such a mental struggle to leave the house for anything other than work.  I can't always even be bothered to go shopping so just eat what is in the house, if anything, and end up paying over the odds for food at work as I have nothing to take in.

If I can get out of the house, then I do generally feel much better but it is SUCH an effort to get out of the house that most of the time I just don't have the strength to do it and this seems to be the thing that people don't get about depression.  And the thought of being alone at the festival surrounded by groups of people with their friends, families and partners just did not bear thinking about.

I have a review with the doctor this week, I just hope that she does not take me off my tablets, I think it is far too soon.

Oh yeah, Andy Murray won Wimbledon :)

Silent Sunday - 07/07/13

Friday, 5 July 2013

10 Day You Challenge - 10 Secrets

10 Secrets

I am not sure I have ten secrets, but I will tell you 10 things that you, my lovely readers, may not know about me.

1.  I did not lose my virginity until I was 40 years of age.  It was arranged with a friend as I wanted to see what all the fuss was about and frankly, I wish I hadn't bothered.

2.  I have never had a boyfriend.  I struggle to find dates and have only had 5 dates in all my life.

3.  I still share my bed with a teddy bear.  Lets face it, there is unlikely to ever be anyone else in my bed.

4.  I have recently become obsessed with the colour purple, the richer the better.

5.  In 2012 I only had 5 nights out.

6.  I have 5 tattoos.

7.  I want to live in Spain, but I don't want to have to work over there so I need to win the Lottery!

8.  I want a baby.  This is just not going to happen.

9.  I have had no hot water in the house (other than the shower or boiling a kettle) for well over 5 years.

10.  I waste far too much money gambling.

That was harder than I expected, there were things that popped into my head but that I could not divulge on here!  Hopefully the next post will be easier.